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Jocelyn Brown
real name: Nick
age: M40-44
live: Dorset
Mhero: Mark Allen
Fhero: Chrissie Wellington
best toy: treadmill
coffee or tea? coffee
Je regret: rien
Job: Body Mechanic
Long term goal: Kona
In a nutshell
Saw Ironman Hawaii on TV Christmas 1992
->Instantly transfixed
->Knew some day I would do it
->Chewed the Cud
-> Uni
-> Work
-> Marriage
-> house
-> baby
-> chewed more cud
-> children
-> went on holiday to Hawaii in Ironman week. Itch has not gone away.
-> chewed cud
-> kids at school now
-> getting creaky still chewing
-> chewed cud long enough
-> IMUK '07
-> that feels better
-> Alpe de Huez tri '09, '11
-> that was good
-> Sprint worlds, Budapest '10
-> that was fun
-> won 1st race, in 21st season
-> kids doing GCSEs
-> still feeling the love
-> one day... Kona.
-> one day...
November 2009... training in the rain
Sun Nov 22, 2009 7:40 pm fruit thief
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Life is good! I’m Grateful to Duffyshuffle for posting the “100 runs in 100 days” training thread. While that’s not going to happen, I have churned out 18 runs so far this month. The shortest 20 minutes and the longest 90 minutes. Ignoring distance, heading for the hills and fields, getting muddy and wet and loving every minute. Set my forerunner to beep whenever leaving base endurance zone – as defined by testing in 2007 – of 135 to 145 bpm. Which is every time the path goes uphill…

I’m commuting by bike to work only once or twice per week at present – it is just not that much fun in the dark and rain- but am swimming more, 2 or 3 times per week & that is providing a bit of cardiovascular intensity. Hitting the gym once per week for core work- rowing, weights and balancing on that daft pink ball trying not to look like a plonker.

There is many a slip twixt cup and lip etc etc... but I’m thinking of this as “preparing to train”: the next step (from December) is to rebuild some sort of aerobic base in the wet dark and blustery British winter, with a February half marathon as a springboard for hard intense training in the Spring. I reeeallly want to qualify for the GB Age Group team this time round M35-39. The qualifying races for Budapest are in May & June, although have not decided yet whether to target Sprint or Olympic distance- my gut feeling is sprint.

These are my HR zones:

Resting: 40-50
Recovery: 120 – 134 ( but life is too busy and short for that)
Base endurance: 135- 145
Tempo: 146 – 153
Lactate threshold: 154 – 160
Race tempo: 161 – 170
Maximum: 181

I’m having a good month so far, feeling fitter and fitter yet pleasantly fresh from all the low intensity. My weight this morning was 68.4kg and that means probably 10% - 11% body fat at the moment. Almost don’t dare to say this, but… no injuries on the radar at present. Planning to gently start “proper” training (ie. with tempo and LT work on the treadmill and turbo) next week.

Bon Voyage and bon appétit,


October 2009, welcome to my relaunched blog.
Wed Sep 30, 2009 7:28 am fruit thief
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Saturday September 11th, 2010. A whole year away. The ITU standard and sprint distance age group world championship triathlons will take place in Budapest, Hungary. I want to be on the start line.

It’s all about the vest. The “TEAM GB” vest. When I am old(er) and creaky(-ier), I want to sit with my grandchildren astride my (undoubtedly replaced) knee; I will be reading them a bed time story but their gaze will drift up to a faded tri vest, framed and gathering dust on the wall. “Grandad”, they will say, “tell us (again) about that time when you raced for Great Britain. Please tell us. (Yet again, for we have forgotten what you said the first hundred times).”

I’ll put their book down, adjust my teeth (thanks, maltodextrin), take a sigh, and begin:

“Well, Zipp” (for surely that will be my grandson’s name; P3C sounds too robotic) “It all started like this…”

What I did on Saturday Night
Fri Oct 17, 2008 1:45 pm fruit thief
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Still alive, but...
Thu May 29, 2008 10:05 am fruit thief
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I'm having a gap year. Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

Seeing exercise in a different light- something to do purely for fun & transport.

I keep reading the race reports & am now pretty sure that- sparing disaster- I'll come back for another Ironman race, but not this year and maybe not even next year. Lanza looks good. IF I do, I'll want to be uberfocused as any German: get the right kit, the right nutrition, the right coaching, the right training, the right mental attitude. That is the easy bit. But to weave this, without pain, into the substance of an otherwise pretty normal life of a working family man- that, as we all know, is the real challenge.

Always at the back of my mind is the call of Kona. Maybe see you there one day? I'm reading your blog. Smile

ramblings in December
Sat Dec 08, 2007 3:50 pm fruit thief
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I went for a swim today. Second swim in 4 months. It felt pretty weird.

After IMUK, I planned to sell the bike, and learn the cello. ANYTHING other than riding , running and swimming!

Well I have taken 4 months off, and I have not sold the bike- though to be fair, nor have I ridden the cursed thing. I have not bought a cello, instead I have booked a family holiday at Club La Santa for 10 days in March 2008. This was a move of dubious financial wisdom as I could have bought a small orchestra on Ebay for similar cost. But I think....

... the tri juices may be starting to, oh so slowly, trickle again.


IMUK 2007 race report
Mon Sep 17, 2007 11:20 pm fruit thief
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report with pictures here

~   Last edited by fruit thief on Thu May 29, 2008 9:48 am; edited 2 times in total
on the home straight...
Sun Aug 12, 2007 3:51 pm fruit thief
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Just a week to go until Ironman UK & I feel- dare I say it- just about ready.

Not much left to say or do, making the last adjustments to kit tonight and then a relaxing week at work… and then the big weekend. Weather permitting we will camp, but if it chucks it down we will probably stay at home.

To my friends who are following this blog, thankyou for the really generous sponsorship which will make a real difference to some of the children at the Pagadupatta Children's Home and Gnana Deepam Matriculation School in the Kalvarayan hills of Tamil Nadu, Southern India. Thanks again!

Good luck to all TriTalkers doing the race too… thanks for all your replies, pokes and encouragement along the way. I get the feeling there will be a lot of geeky triathletes like me on the startline nursing their typing overuse injuries…

Next time I post will be to say how it all went.

So until then,


training ready for the potentially combative swim start, with help from Jordan & Sam

this is what I will be weraing & riding at Sherborne

3 weeks to go
Sun Jul 29, 2007 6:27 am fruit thief
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So, 3 weeks to the day to go until Ironman UK.

I managed my first proper long ride yesterday- 20 miles out to Sherborne, 2 laps of the course, 20 miles home. It hurt. Fills me with a bit of trepidation. However... I think I could have waddled slowly for a few miles afterwards, although obviously I did not try, opting instead to plunge straight into the fridge.

Here's how the 2 laps went:
At planned race effort + HR (max 140s on the flats, 150s on the climbs)
Sherborne castle- T junction at start of loop: 7 mins
Lap 1: 1h52
lap 2: 1h57
Back to Sherborne Castle: 5 mins

So, I think I'm looking approx 6 hours as a target for the bike. It is a tough course, for comparison I had the 9th fastest bike split 2h18 at Weymouth Middle Distance a few weeks ago.

But I have decided to train like a pro next week. Here is my plan:

Monday: autologous blood transfusion
Tuesday: Insulin like factor and dexamphetamine
Wednseday: Epo
Thursday: Nandrolone
Friday: Human Growth Hormone
Saturday: Testosterone
Sunday: rest day.

is it only 5 weeks?
Sun Jul 15, 2007 7:50 pm fruit thief
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The little fellah with the broken arm is mending well, thankyou for all the messages of support.

Last week took some re-arranging on every level because he has been off school & back to the hospital. Training took a back seat, although I got some quality sessions in this weekend:

Monday: nowt
Tuesday: nowt
Wednesday: nowt
Thursday: 30 min run
Friday: nowt
Saturday: 40 mile bike (am) + 2 hours on the turbo (pm) with Harry POtter and the Order of the phoenix DVD giving me the heebie jeebies
Sunday: 2 hours on the turbo watching le Tour followed by a 40 minute steady run

A big week planned now, fractures permitting. Don't know if I'll manage it but here goes:
Mon: 40 mins run
Tue: nowt
Wed: 3 hours bike
Thu: 1 hour turbo
Fri: 90 minute swim
Sat: 6 hours bike (am), 2 hour run (pm)
Sun: 1 hour run

Good luck everyone

Luke: yes, writing hand. And bum wiping hand, it turns out.
Wiganer: Thanks from your wishes "from t' north", they made it safely despite taking a wrong turn just after Northampton
Daz: Yes(family) & no (ImUK)! Thanks
Tabtri & Scottg: Thanks again for the good wishes
Wonderboy: I also noticed you didn't "hang around" when you flew past me in the first Km of the run! Great result. You have a cute baby (I assume that it was yours you were manhandling in a sweaty fashion at the finish line?)
Slacko: Thorntons!

A weekend in hospital with a sneaky tri
Sun Jul 08, 2007 5:34 pm fruit thief
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What a weekend it has been in our house.

After registering for Sunday's Bournemouth tri on Saturday, we took the kids to play in the sun in a playground at the Littledown Centre. 4pm, our 7 year old fell off the monkey bars and obviously broke his arm in a nasty way- his hand and wrist were pointing off at about 60 degrees to his forearm and his elbow was the size of a tennis ball.

Ambulance to A&E at Poole, and to cut a long story short he ended up having his fractured humerus, ulna and radius fixed in theatre at 11pm. He was back on the ward by 1am.

Now if I have ever complained about my wife's lack of understanding regarding tri, may I formally and immediately take it all back. The woman is a heroine. "I know how much you have been looking forward to this race, there is no point this spoiling all of our weekends, I'll stay here overnight with t'lad, you go home and get a few hours sleep, do your race, and then come and take over from me".

The more I tried to object, the more she insisted. I'm a lucky man. It didn't feel quie right getting home at 2am, bundling my bike and wetsuit into the car, filing up a few bottles with maxim while wife and son were in hospital. But on a pragmatic level she was quite right. I'd paid 50 quid to race, and there was still the chance for one of us to salvage something from a bad situation.

So I did the race. Enjoyed it & really gave it some welly, for the sake of my son, if that makes any sense at all. Met Will who is a gent and a fast one. The ref let me take my bike out as soon as I had done at 9.10 and get back to the hospital for 9.30. Heidi then went home to get some sleep, and I stayed with our son until he was discharged about 1 hour ago.

The surgeons said is unusual to fracture humerus, radius and ulna all at once, but that the injury is fixed and he will be fine in 5 or 6 weeks when all the metalwork is out. He has been an absoulte star, so brave, much braver than I was when I broke my leg... as an adult! The paramedics & hospital were humblingly superb.

Hope everyone else's weekend was less eventful


ScottG: Pull your finger out man, you've still got a month and a half Wink
Tabtri: thanks!

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